What did you do to make that happen?

I have actually been asked this question...More than once.


The G Word
Whether or not your child has food allergies or just a crooked nose, we all feel it, we all suffer from it, and it is highly likely that most of us have projected it onto others.  Unfortunately, I didn't need anyone's help in drumming up my own little dose of parental guilt.

When W was first diagnosed with his first food allergy, eggs, I remember thinking back over my pregnancy and realizing that early on I ate eggs almost daily.  It was all I wanted, my one big craving.  At that point I did let the thought pass through my head that I had somehow caused this diagnosis.  And then came the cat allergy, banana, avocado, latex, peanuts, milk and so forth.   So was it me?  Did I eat to many bananas or pet the cat too much?

Having my third baby, I knew then and I know now that I didn't take care of myself as well as I did with the first two.  I missed a few prenatal vitamins here and there.  I pushed myself when I probably shouldn't (although I challenge anyone to try having two kids under 6 while taking it easy.) I didn't get enough sleep or water or sleep.

But that's just life, right?  That doesn't make a child come out with allergies! But of course that nagging little voice in the back of your head will always tell you otherwise.

More than Enough
So that guilt that I felt from rehashing my pregnancy was probably not justified, but it was only the start.  Add to that the fact that almost 90% of the time, the reaction that my child just had, the reason he just threw up and broke out into hives?  That was because I was forcing feeding him something that his body just didn't like.

GUILT.

At an allergy appointment when W was about 9 months old, the doctor commented that some kids have reported strange and uncommon taste from food indicating the presence of an allergen, such as sweet foods tasting spicy.  Several times W had taken one bite of a food just to turn his head and refuse more.  My other two didn't do that so I would try again and again to feed it to him and he would reluctantly oblige, just to have a reaction minutes later.  The doctor confirmed that these foods could be causing a burning or tingling sensation in W's mouth, and his only means of communicating this was to turn his head and refuse more.

GUILT.

And then there is the label reading.  Make sure to get through the whole list, and know all of the words for milk, eggs, wheat, etc.  Even when you do...Oops.  How did I miss that part of the label?

GUILT.


Laugh Through the Tears

So I am trying to learn to laugh.  Not when a reaction is happening, or when I am trying to explain to someone the seriousness of his allergies, but maybe a bit after the EpiPen experience in referring to the culprit as "The Death Cookie"or finding the humor in this creative video imagined by kids and acted by adults.

And if the laughing doesn't help the guilt enough.  There is always this statement from www.parents.com:

"Children are more likely to have allergies if their parents are allergic. A child with one parent who has any kind of allergy, including environmental or seasonal allergies, has a 30 percent chance of becoming allergic."

Why does this help?  Because the hubby is allergic to dogs, fire ants, and maybe now cinnamon.  Translation: It's his fault! (Love ya, hon!)